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Tagmotherhood

How to approach the rage cleaning woman and survive

This house was clean yesterday we're sorry you missed it

I used to think that when the house got too dirty, my husband would take one look at it and decide that instead of cleaning it himself, now was the perfect time to royally piss me off.

Because boy can I clean in a rage.

As my temper explodes like Mount Vesuvius, violently spewing forth a deadly cloud of super-heated gases high into the sky, ejecting molten rock, pulverized pumice and hot ash at 1.5 million tons per second, the tiniest thing out of place becomes a target.

I clean the kitchen with loud determination. I wipe surfaces clean of dust with forceful intent. I aggressively vacuum carpets to within an inch of their lives.

I deposit trash by the front door with a fury and purpose that would make Lyssa, the ancient Greek goddess for mad rage, envious.

The house becomes a scene from a disaster movie, with children and spouses running barely ahead of the impending doom, squealing in terror and picking up favourite toys and clothes before they’re sucked into the cleaning tornado never to be seen again.

And oh the humanity, the socks. πŸ™‰

Socks EVERYWHERE.

Balled up in the couch. Shoved into bookshelves. Left on top of shoes. Lounging casually on stairs. Reposing under the kitchen table. Thrown over the armrest of the easy chair. And very rarely in pairs, like they were never meant to have mates.

I think a messy kitchen and dishes left all over the house are my biggest triggers these days.

That, and stepping on Legos. There’s nothing like a Lego underfoot to make the rage travel instantly from that pointy sonofabitch up your body until the top of you head blows off like a cartoon.

What about you? What makes you scrub the house like the whole damn thing needs to be sent to its room and think about what it did?

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Unslept nights, teething fevers and crushing loneliness. Did you know that being a stay-at-home mom could be this exhausting?

How exhausting it can be to be a stay-at-hoome mom

Parenting is hard. Especially, when you’re trying to be patient with a little impatient versions of yourself.

Parenting is the easiest thing in the world to have an opinion about, but the hardest thing in the world to do.

If parenting came with a GPS it would just mostly say “recalculating”.

It often feels like 90% of parenting consists of thinking about when you can lie down again. It’s a constant battle between going to bed early to catch up on some sleep and staying awake to finally get some alone time.

And it’s hilarious when kids trundle up to you and tell you they’re bored. As if the lady standing in front of a full sink of dishes is where you get ideas about how to have a good time.

They say it takes a village to raise a child. Where can I get directions to this frickin’ village??

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How to reconnect with your womanhood by celebrating life, change and new beginnings the traditional way

African proverb about being pregnant

Birth isn’t just about making babies. It’s also about making mothers: strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength.

As wonderful as modern technology is, the medicalisation of birth has distanced us from that inner strength and diminished our connection to ourselves during this transformational process.

The time following giving birth is one of openness and healing. You may feel leaky – both literally and energetically – and not quite like yourself yet.

Traditional midwifery has some wonderful traditions and bodywork techniques that will support you through this time of transitioning and aid in your healing.

Any time is a good time to celebrate birth, motherhood and being a woman!

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